How to Survive a Bad Date

Spotting the Signs of a Bad Date

Before we get into the nitty-gritty of escape routes, it’s crucial to know when you’re actually on a lousy date. Sometimes, it’s not immediately apparent. The conversation might start awkwardly, but that’s normal, right? Maybe. But there are key red flags for that scream, “Get out while you can!”

Red Flags in Conversations

When your date monopolizes the conversation or, worse, talks about their ex the entire time, it’s a sign the evening isn’t going to improve. Equally, if they make inappropriate comments or ask too many personal questions too soon, these are clear signals that you’re not on the same wavelength.

Body Language Clues

Is your date avoiding eye contact, crossing their arms, or constantly checking their phone? These non-verbal cues often indicate they’re either uninterested or rude. Conversely, if they’re overly touchy-feely too soon, that’s a different kind of bad.

General Vibe

Sometimes, it’s just a gut feeling. If the vibe is off and you’re not enjoying yourself, it’s perfectly fine to label the date a dud. Trust your instincts—they’re rarely wrong.

10 Quick Tips to Survive a Bad Date

Here are ten quick and practical tips to help you navigate awkward moments, steer conversations, and make a graceful exit when necessary. Stay calm, trust your instincts, and remember—you can always turn a bad date into a good story!

• Plan an Escape Route: Have a prearranged excuse ready if you need to leave early.
• Focus on Neutral Topics: Steer the conversation towards safe subjects like hobbies or travel.
• Stay Calm: Don’t let the awkwardness get to you—take deep breaths and stay composed.
• Use Humor: Lighten the mood with a joke if things feel too tense.
• Be a Good Listener: Let them do most of the talking—sometimes, less is more.
• Keep it Short: Suggest ending the date after a drink or coffee if it’s not going well.
• Bring Up a Friend: Mention meeting a friend afterward to signal you won’t stay long.
• Trust Your Gut: Don’t hesitate to end the date early if something feels off.
• Stay Positive: Focus on the silver lining—at least it’s a story to tell later.
• Be Polite but Firm: If you need to leave, do so politely but with confidence.

Keep Calm and Carry On: Managing Awkward Conversations

The second key to surviving a bad date is knowing how to steer the conversation away from disaster zones. If your date keeps bringing up controversial topics or droning on about something painfully boring, try shifting the conversation to neutral ground.

Finding Common Ground

Ask questions about hobbies, travel experiences, or food preferences. Most people love talking about their favorite restaurants or travel destinations. If all else fails, compliment them on something—people generally like to talk about themselves, and flattery, if sincere, can be a lifeline in these situations.

Injecting Humor Into the Situation

Humor can be a great way to diffuse tension and turn the tide on a bad date. If something awkward happens, like an uncomfortable silence, don’t be afraid to acknowledge it with a light-hearted joke. “Well, this is going great, isn’t it?” Saying this with a smile can sometimes break the ice and make the situation more bearable.

The Art of Active Listening

When all else fails, become a listener. People appreciate someone who listens more than they talk, especially if they’re chatty. Nod, smile, and occasionally comment to show you’re engaged, even if your mind is planning your escape route.

How to Politely End a Bad Date

The moment has arrived. You’ve realized this date isn’t just bad—it’s the bad that deserves a gold medal. Now, how do you make your escape without causing a scene?

Have an Exit Strategy in Mind

Before you even step foot in the restaurant, have a plan. Text a friend to be on standby for a fake emergency. The key is to be subtle. A quick “I’m sorry, I have to go, something urgent came up,” delivered with just the right amount of concern usually does the trick.

Be Honest but Kind

If the thought of lying makes you sweat, there’s always the option of being upfront. A simple “I’m not sure this is working, but it was nice meeting you” is refreshingly honest. Sure, it’s awkward, but it’s also respectful. Remember to be gentle with your words; you do not need to crush someone’s self-esteem.

Blame It on an Early Morning

If you want to avoid confrontation, the classic “I have an early morning” excuse is your best friend. This versatile, believable excuse gets you out the door quickly. Don’t use it if your date knows you have the day off tomorrow!

5 Clever and Polite Ways to End a Bad Date Gracefully

Ending a bad date can be tricky, but with a touch of creativity, you can exit gracefully and maybe even leave your date with a smile. Here are some clever ideas to end a bad date:

1. The Pre-Planned Phone Call:
Set up a pre-arranged call with a friend. If the date is going well, ignore it. If not, answer with, “Oh no, that sounds serious. I should take care of that. I’m sorry, but I have to leave.”

2. The Sudden Flash of Inspiration:
“I just remembered I promised my neighbor I’d help them with something tonight. It completely slipped my mind until now! I should head out to help them.”

3. The Pop-Up Commitment:
“I just got a reminder about a webinar/online event I signed up for starting soon. I forgot about it, and it’s essential to my work/studies. I’m sorry, but I need to log in.”

4. The Favor Call:
“My friend just messaged me—they’re locked out of their apartment and need me to bring them a spare key. I should go help them out. It was nice meeting you!”

5. The Unexpected Curfew:
“Oops, I didn’t realize how late it’s getting. I promised to stick to a strict bedtime routine for an early start tomorrow. I should head home, but it was nice meeting you.”

What to Do If They Don’t Get the Hint

Sometimes, despite your best efforts, your date won’t take no for an answer. They might push for another drink or a second location, or they won’t stop talking. Here’s how to handle that tricky situation.

Stay Firm but Polite

Repeat your reason for leaving and make it clear you’re done. “I do need to go now, but it was nice meeting you” should be your go-to line. Stand up as you say it, signaling the date is officially over.

Signal for Help

If you feel uncomfortable or unsafe, don’t hesitate to ask for help. Most bartenders and servers are trained to recognize when a customer needs to leave a bad situation. A simple “Can you help me with something?” can be enough to get them to step in.

Have a Backup Plan

Always have a backup plan. Arrange for a friend to call or text if you haven’t checked in by a specific time. This way, you have a prearranged reason to leave. Plus, it adds a layer of safety, which is never bad.

Staying Safe and Sane: When the Date Takes a Dark Turn

The final key to surviving a bad date is knowing when to prioritize your safety and well-being. If your date is making you uncomfortable or seems unsafe, it’s essential to trust your instincts.

Have a Backup Plan

Always let a friend or family member know where you are and who you’re with. Have a code word or text message you can send if you need them to call and “rescue” you. This can be your out if things start to feel off.

Be Ready to Walk Away

If your date crosses a line at any point—be it inappropriate comments or behavior—you have every right to leave. Don’t worry about being polite; your safety is more important. Excuse yourself to the restroom, gather your belongings, and head for the exit.

Listen to Your Gut

Your intuition is a powerful tool. If something feels wrong, it probably is. Don’t ignore those feelings. Give yourself permission to walk away, whether it’s a subtle vibe or an outright red flag. No date is worth compromising your comfort or safety.

Learning from the Experience

So you’ve escaped your bad date—congratulations! Now, it’s time to reflect and learn. Why didn’t the date go well? Was it just bad chemistry, or were there warning signs you missed? Understanding what went wrong can help you avoid similar situations in the future.

Self-Reflection

Think about what you could do differently next time. Maybe it’s setting more explicit boundaries from the start or choosing a different type of date location that allows for an easier exit.

Talk It Out

Sometimes, talking about the experience with a friend can offer new perspectives. They might see something you missed or have advice for next time. Plus, sharing your bad date story can be surprisingly therapeutic.

Move On

Most importantly, don’t dwell on it. Bad dates happen to everyone. The sooner you laugh it off and move on, the sooner you’ll be ready for your next (hopefully better) date.